is becoming increasingly more
common. The once-taboo topic, seems to be flooding our airways, and our
conversations. If it's not about us, it is about someone not too far removed.
The 'D' word is popping -up EVERYWHERE!
"Many of the social restraints which in the past have helped to reinforce and to shore up the family is dissolving and disappearing. The time will come when only those who believe deeply and actively in the family will be able to preserve their families in the midst of the gathering evil around us."
Being able to
put the blame on anyone cause for the D-word is a little difficult since we
are dealing with individual situations. What we can easily see are historical
trends, and potential factors that influence the outcome, or the impact that it
has on families, children, and societies.
Number of divorced adults in 1960 was 393,000
Number of divorced adults in 2008 was 8,444,000
Rates have continued to drop, but are still higher than 1960
In a talk published in April 2007, by a member of
the Twelve Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, titled
Divorce, Dallin H. Oaks says,
“A good marriage does not require a perfect man
or a perfect woman. It only requires a man and a woman committed to strive
together toward perfection.”
But, when is divorce the answer? Is there no
marriage that shouldn’t be dissolved? Elder Oaks clarifies these questions, and
speaks to those who have, or should seek refuge.
“There are many good Church members who have
been divorced. I speak first to them. We know that many of you are innocent
victims—members whose former spouses persistently betrayed sacred covenants or
abandoned or refused to perform marriage responsibilities for an extended
period. Members who have experienced such abuse have firsthand knowledge of
circumstances worse than divorce.”
He continues with the reassuring counsel that
when the marriage is dead, and hope is no longer alive, that we have the option
to end the union.
“When a marriage is dead and beyond hope of
resuscitation, it is needful to have the means to end it.”
For the rest of those who may be in rocky marriages,
who may be suffering from redeemable offenses or repairable situations, his
counsel is much different.
“I strongly urge you and those who advise you to
face up to the reality that for most marriage problems, the remedy is not
divorce but repentance.”
He then concludes with the sweet and tender
words of his own personal experiences that marriage can be what God intended.
From personal experience, I testify to the sweetness of the marriage and family life that the family proclamation
describes as founded upon a husband and wife’s “solemn responsibility to love
and care for each other and for their children” and “upon the teachings of the
Lord Jesus Christ.”8 I
testify of Him as our Savior and pray in His name for all who strive for the
supreme blessings of an eternal family, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.”
